


I'll Be There

by Bookshido



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Accidental Offending, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bipolar Disorder, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Gadreel's POV, Mental Health Issues, Reader with Bipolar Disorder, Supportive Gadreel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-17
Updated: 2017-06-17
Packaged: 2018-11-15 04:39:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11223510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bookshido/pseuds/Bookshido
Summary: Request from @kazchester-fanfiction: Ok here it goes: can you do a gadreel x reader? The reader has been friends with the winchesters for a long time, and they’re practically family. The boys as well as cas know how the reader suffers from bi polar disorder, but gadreel doesn’t. Because it’s not something he can necessarily heal. He’s frustrated because he feels helpless. but in the end, he learns the best thing he can do to help is to just be there for her. Can you do a kind of possessive!gadreel. Sorry if that’s too much!





	I'll Be There

“Gadreel, if you are going to be staying with Sam and Dean and Y/N, you need to be as unthreatening as possible,” Castiel explained as they walked up to the bunker door. “And try to be as… How did Dean put it. ‘Not completely hopeless’, I think?”

“Dean Winchester is a brash human being with a long list of demands,” Gadreel observed, his voice even as they approached the door.

It was still very hard to believe that after everything he had done, they were going to offer him asylum until the threat of Metatron was dealt with. He knew that the Winchester brothers had had an ax to grind with him since he had followed Metatron’s orders and killed the last Prophet and had taken Sam’s body with him. But this was unprecedented kindness.

“He will attempt to make movie and book references to you,” Castiel warned, looking at Gadreel very seriously. “To prevent conflict, just nod or laugh. Whichever seems more appropriate. They will berate you otherwise.”

Gadreel nodded, understanding and making sure to remember that for later. Castiel took a deep breath and opened the door to the bunker, yelling the brothers’ names as he went inside. Gadreel followed, closing the door behind him, but not locking it. Castiel noticed and gestured for Gadreel to finish the job, which he did easily.

They walked down the steps into what looked to be a war room that resembled the one in Heaven. Gadreel observed each detail as Castiel yelled for the brothers and Y/N again.

Footsteps echoed closer with this call for them and Gadreel watched all of the doorways for any sign of movement.

“Gadreel, you’re familiar with Sam and Dean,” Castiel introduced. “But Y/N just moved into the bunker with them a few days ago.”

The brothers and a woman who could only be Y/N walked into the room, chatting quietly, then dropping their conversation when they saw that he and Castiel had arrived. Gadreel almost forgot his manners at the sight of Y/N. She was even more breath-taking than Castiel had described her as. Dressed in a tight forest green tank top and with skin tight dark wash jeans, she looked like a hunter and the look on her face confirmed that. It impressed him to meet a woman who could probably kick his ass if he got into a confrontation with her.

“Thank you for letting me stay here,” Gadreel said quietly, dipping his head to them. “I will be forever in your debt.”

“No problem,” Dean said genuinely. “It’s good to have you on our side again.”

Sam seemed to be a little on edge about Gadreel’s arrival and the angel didn’t blame him. Gadreel knew everything about Sam and had taken his body for a ‘joyride’, as the humans said.

“I want to clear the air before we begin my tenement here,” Gadreel said, ignoring his younger brother’s look. “Samuel, I am very sorry for possessing you multiple times without your knowledge. And I am sorry to all of you for smiting your friend, Kevin Tran.”

“Seriously, don’t mention it,” Dean said, watching the angel carefully and seeming a bit surprised by the apology.

No one said anything for almost a whole minute and fifteen seconds, by Gadreel’s count.

“I’ll, uh, show you to your room,” Dean said, breaking the tense silence.

He exited the room by way of a side hallway that Gadreel was quick to follow him down, not wanting to get lost in the maze of corridors.

They arrived at a plain room with a simple bed and a desk and chair.

“This bed won’t be needed,”  Gadreel stated.

“Do you still have your grace?” Dean asked him, looking anywhere but at the angel.

“Yes,” Gadreel said simply, testing the springiness of the bed with one hand.

“Then I assume you don’t sleep?” Dean asked with a sigh.

“No, I don’t,” Gadreel agreed, taking a seat on the edge of the mattress and staring at Dean.

“Then just stay out of the kitchen and the dungeon files after everyone else has gone to bed,” Dean said with another sigh. “We don’t want you getting trapped in one of the freezers or the dungeon.”

“I won’t,” Gadreel promised as Dean started to leave.

“And, Gadreel?” Dean called over his shoulder, pausing in the doorway.

“Yes?” Gadreel asked, looking over at Dean.

“Don’t try anything with Y/N,” he warned, exiting the room and leaving the angel alone with his thoughts.

* * *

 The days slipped into weeks and then months. The brothers continued in their hospitality and each time Gadreel apologized for extending his stay, they merely shrugged and told him that he was welcome as long as he needed a place to stay.

Gadreel was never left alone with Y/N or in the bunker. Sam, Dean, and Castiel took turns watching him as they vanished off for days on their hunts.

This was a wise tactical decision, Gadreel decided. He was still considered a threat and a possible ally of Metatron, despite his defection status.

He could be of help if their bunker came under siege while they were gone and he knew that Metatron was still ‘after his ass’, as Dean said.

The bunker became his new home; the Winchesters, his new family. And Y/N… that was hard to explain.

* * *

 As he became more at home in the bunker and got to know everyone, Gadreel became especially fascinated with Y/N.

She always wore something similar to what she had met the first time he met her; some kind of tank top with jeans. The colors changed all the time, but there were periods of time where it was nothing but blacks and other dark colors that were following with the brightest colors of spring and summer: pinks and yellows with vibrant neons and pure snow white. Y/N seemed to have every single

It was hypnotizing to watch her work. The little things that made her human; twirling her hair around her finger until the tip turned purple and she had to unwrap the newly curled hair; dabbing her mouth after every sip of the water she always seemed to drink; getting up from her favorite chair and sitting position with indentations stretched across her always bare shoulders.

Y/N never drank alcohol, even after she and the brothers would come home from hunts. Both brothers would get steaming drunk and need both Gadreel and Castiel’s assistance to return to their rooms, but Y/N never did. It puzzled him, but he feared to know what she was like when intoxicated. He suspected it had something to do with the unbalance of hormones in her brain chemistry.

The greatest mystery of this woman was the medication she took every morning and evening with breakfast and dinner. Gadreel could only watch in fascination as she took a deep gulp of water and dropped the pill into her mouth like a mother bird feeding her chicks. Then came the swallow, the bulge in her throat vanishing as she sighed happily. There seemed to be no real reason for her to be taking this medication, in his eyes, but he knew that humans only took medication in such doses if they had to.  

* * *

It was on a cold February day that he observed that she hadn’t taken any of her usual medication with breakfast. Upon further investigation into her bathroom trash can, he found the empty bottle, tossed away. He read over the label, not understanding why she was in need of taking Lithium. As far as he knew, that was a very dangerous element that reacts dangerously with humans when ingested. And Y/N had been taking it for months? How had she not died? This was something he would have to investigate even further. 

* * *

 After breakfast, the whole group gathered in the library, researching for anything that could stop Metatron and take the angels back to Heaven. It was quiet, except for the noise of clicking keyboard keys and the flip of pages. He and Castiel were on ancient scroll duty, as they were the only ones who could read the long dead language.

Now seemed like the perfect time to ask, so ask he did.

“What is the dysfunction in your brain?” Gadreel asked her bluntly, cocking his head and making eye contact. “Can it be healed?”

She gaped at him in shock and surprise, looking more upset and scared by the minute. Dean started to advance towards Gadreel, but Sam held him back, giving Dean a look that told him to calm down.

“I have been sensing a dysfunction since we first met,” Gadreel explained, looking at the humans and his brother. “In her brain. I don’t know what it is, but it is harming her somehow and has been for a long time. It became stronger today. ”

“I-I have to go,” Y/N said, suddenly holding back tears as she inched out of the room.

“Nice job,” Dean snapped, following Y/N out.

“Was that the wrong thing to say?” Gadreel asked Sam, bewildered.

“Yeah, Gadreel, it was,” Sam sighed, getting up and walking out of the room, headed to the kitchen.

Gadreel followed Sam, curious as to what he was doing.

Sam spent the next fifteen minutes preparing a bowl of red soup and a mug of hot chamomile tea. The younger Winchester worked with ease and a smoothness that Gadreel remembered from his time in Sam’s body.

Once the soup was all the way cooked, Sam used an overlarge spoon to ladle a scoop of the soup into the porcelain bowl, which he set on a wooden tray that had seemed to appear out of nowhere. A napkin was set next to the soup bowl and smoothed flat with Sam’s large hands. Sam then pulled open a drawer and removed two spoons, placing one next to the tea and the other next to the soup. The tray looked elegant, like it was a whole dinner.

“Take this to her,” Sam ordered, handing the tray to Gadreel. “And remember to apologize.”

* * *

Gadreel knocked on the door, balancing the tray on one hand to allow his hand to knock on it. He returned the tray to a two handed holding position as he heard footsteps approach the door. It wouldn’t do to spill the tray at this point.

Dean opened the door a crack, looking Gadreel up and down before his eyes landed on the tray in his arms. Dean nodded to the angel and opened the door more widely, letting Gadreel in.

Y/N was crumpled up on the bed, working her way through a box of tissues. At the sight of Gadreel, her eyes started to tear up more.

“Y/N?” Gadreel asked, setting the tray down on the bedside table. “Y/N, I-”

She silenced him with a wave of her hand and took a shaky breath.

“Dean, can you leave us alone,” she asked, her voice almost a whisper.

“Y/N, are you sure?” Dean asked, standing close to the door.

“Yes, I am,” she said, nodding.

Dean looked between Gadreel and Y/N, but nodded, stepping out of the room and shutting the door with a click behind him.

Gadreel was the first to speak.

“I am sorry if I offended you,” he apologized. “The dysfunction seems to be becoming a more pressing issue and I thought that I would be able to help.”

“Gadreel, that’s very kind of you,” she said, shifting under the blanket. “But Castiel already tried. It didn’t work.”

“What is the disorder?” Gadreel asked, his eyes hardening with determination.

“Gadreel, you have to understand, it can’t be healed,” she protested. “Telling you won’t help me-”

“Y/N, I want to help,” Gadreel insisted. “But I can’t if I don’t know what you have.”

She looked like she was on the border of telling him, but she instead started a fresh stream of crying. He didn’t know how to react at first, but he walked over to the bed and at down next to her, ignoring the squeak of surprise she made and wrapping his arms around her shaking figure. Y/N kept crying and he kept hugging her, noticing the strange sensation of her tears soaking through his shirt and touching his vessel’s skin.

She finally calmed down after a couple of minutes (Gadreel wasn’t paying attention to the actual count because he was counting her breaths) and cleared her throat with a delicate cough.

“I have bipolar disorder,” she said in a whisper. “I probably should have told you, but I didn’t-I didn’t…”

Suddenly, it all made sense. The lack of alcohol intake, the bursts of color choices, the medicine. It all clicked into place now.

“Shush, shush, it’s alright,” Gadreel said soothingly, holding her closer to his chest.

“I didn’t want to screw up my chances with you,” she admitted, fresh tears falling from her eyes. “You’re this perfect angel and I’m a defective human. I can’t even go a day without medication because I’m too scared of going through another episode.”

“Y/N, you aren’t defective,” Gadreel said, running his hand through her hair. “And I’m not perfect. I know how this disorder works, I know about the lows and highs. I want to be there for you, if you’ll have me for them.”

She pulled back at that, grabbing a tissue and blowing her nose, balling it up and throwing it towards the trash can. It bounced off the edge and landed in the can, making her smile briefly.

“I haven’t had an episode in almost two years,” she explained, rubbing the tears from her eyes and grabbing another tissue from the box. “My medication use has been pretty much constant until today. I ran out by accident, I’ve been so fucking distracted by the Metatron situation that I didn’t even notice. My prescription is going to be ready tomorrow.”

“I’ll go with you,” Gadreel stated, surprising Y/N.

“You will?” she asked, confused. “But… why?”

“I said that I would be there for you,” he promised, gently reaching up a hand to stroke the side of her cheek. “And that means that I’ll be there every step of the way. When the rain starts to pour, when the storms rage overhead. I’ve been in this kind of position before. I know how it feels to hit rock bottom and I promise you, Y/N, that I will never let you sink that low ever again. Bipolar disorder or not, I love you.”

He was a little shocked that he had been able to say it, but the tender kiss she gave him was well worth the confession.

“That was…” she said, when the kiss finally broke.

“Impressive,” Gadreel finished, smiling at her.

Her stomach chose that moment to rumble loudly and she looked embarrassed.

“Want to share some soup with me?” she asked shyly, dipping her spoon into the soup.

“Of course,” he said, smiling widely.

This was what he had always needed. 


End file.
